Remember these lovely things?
I originally posted about trying to rid both Joshua and my house of the binky all the way back in October, just after he turned two. Back then, all my efforts were for nothing, as neither Joshua nor The Hubby were ready to kiss the darn thing goodbye — and so I had to kiss the little “operation” goodbye instead. Since then, he went from referring to it by whining to calling it “B”, and then from “B” it somehow became “Beya”.
This was taken on December 23.
And now a new year is upon us and the tides have turned! That’s right, ladies and gentlemen —
We had a breakthrough last night.
Actually, I should say two nights ago, as it was Sunday night into yesterday morning where I discovered the good news. So here’s the deal: Joshua’s a really poor sleeper. Like, really poor. How Joshua gets to sleep depends on who’s putting him to bed — if I do it, I have to sit in the rocking chair, as he literally will not let me tuck him into bed, maybe try reading a story, and then patting him for a minute or two and leaving the room. If The Hubby does it, the two of them get right into bed together and cuddle for a few minutes until Joshua passes out. He falls asleep by 8pm most nights but then wakes up by midnight, crying for daddy. My poor Hubs spends part of his night in bed with me and then the rest of it in Joshua’s twin bed. He’s tried cuddling him and then leaving, both while Joshua is still awake (but drowsy) and after he’s fallen asleep, to no avail…so Hubs just gave up one night and fell asleep in Joshua’s bed, and it’s been like that ever since.
Yesterday morning, though, Hubs informed me that, after moving into Joshua’s bed, he noticed that Joshua fell asleep without Beya and slept through the night. I thought that was weird, because I had given the binky to Joshua when I put him down for the night, so he had it with him in bed. In the past, the thing might as well have been glued to his lips, so hearing this was both shocking and incredibly exciting for me.
My opportunity had finally arisen, and last night, the real magic happened.
Joshua and I have had a running deal for virtually his entire life that I brush his teeth just before bed, and then he gets the binky as soon as I’m done. Last night, he was being particularly difficult about brushing, so I gave him a warning:
“If you don’t let me brush your teeth, I can’t let you have Beya. You can only use Beya after your mouth is clean.”
He refused to let me finish brushing his teeth (I’m talking thrashing, screaming, kicking refusal), so I set him down on the floor from his position on the changing table, told him that he couldn’t go to sleep with Beya, and left the room. An expected tantrum ensued, and Joshua followed me into the kitchen.
“We need to finish brushing your teeth first.”
“Let’s finish brushing your teeth, and then you can have your Beya.”
I sat him on the kitchen counter, toothbrush still in my hand, and tried to brush one last time. Again, he violently refused.
I saw the opportunity, and I seized it.
“I’m sorry, Joshua. Because you’re not letting me brush your teeth, you’ll have to go to bed tonight without Beya.”
And with that, I picked him up, carried him into his bedroom, switched off the light, turned on the sound machine and projector, and sat down in the rocking chair.
…And I braced myself for the mother of all tantrums.
Surprisingly, it was very short-lived. Joshua freaked out for a few minutes, trying to get out of my lap to go looking for his binky, and I just held him tightly and rocked in silence. After a few minutes, he stopped fighting and, before I knew it, he was asleep. I moved him to his bed, covered him, handed him his Duckie, and left the room. A few hours later, I awoke to discover The Hubby not in bed with me (so Joshua had probably come into our room and woke him up), and said a little prayer that Hubs hadn’t caved in his drowsiness and handed over the beloved Beya.
When I woke up this morning, Hubs informed me that Beya was still on his dresser and that he’d never given it to Joshua. I had him move it into a drawer and we presented a united front the moment Joshua started asking for his Beya:
“We don’t know where it is, Little Bear. Beya is missing. We think Beya is gone. Beya went bye-bye.”
He walked around for a little while this morning saying, “No Beya. Beya gone. Beya bye-bye,” but that was it. I put him down for a nap nearly two hours ago; he asked for it once, and I told him I didn’t know where it was. He fell asleep without further argument and that was it.
I think we’ve finally reached the end of the Beya era! I don’t want to say, “Mission accomplished!” just yet because I don’t know if the game is truly over, or if there’s still another round to play. Hopefully we’ll know in the next few days. Once we do know for sure that it’s over, I think I’d like to take Joshua to Build-a-Bear and make a bear together with Beya stuffed inside, so it will always be with him. I can only hope that Joshua never tears the bear open and tries to dig Beya out. I’ll have to sneak Beya to the salesperson so make sure that doesn’t happen. It’s a covert operation, you know?!
Well, Beya, it’s been real; it’s been fun; it hasn’t been real fun.